Bad Experiences While Performing Master Thesis Project

by Anonymous

What should have been an enlightening academic journey turned into a nightmarish experience due to a toxic research environment that undermined both my academic progress and mental well-being. The problems began shortly after joining the research group, where I encountered a deeply problematic dynamic between senior researchers and graduate students.

My supervisor, while brilliant in their field, exhibited controlling behavior that went far beyond normal academic oversight. They would frequently dismiss my research ideas without proper discussion, often in front of other lab members, creating an atmosphere of constant humiliation. Work completed over weeks would be casually dismissed with cutting remarks like “This is completely wrong” or “Maybe research isn’t for you,” without any constructive feedback to guide improvement.

The toxic environment extended beyond just supervisor interactions. Senior PhD students, perhaps mirroring the supervisor’s behavior, created a hierarchical culture where new students were expected to take on their work without question. I found myself handling data analysis for other students’ projects while my own research stagnated. Refusing these “requests” led to social isolation and subtle retaliation, such as being excluded from important lab meetings or having equipment access mysteriously restricted.

The situation reached its peak when I discovered that some of my preliminary research findings had been presented at a conference by my supervisor without my knowledge or attribution. When I raised this issue, I was told I should be “grateful” for having my work associated with the lab at all, even if my name wasn’t mentioned.

The impact on my mental health was severe. What started as enthusiasm for research transformed into anxiety about entering the lab each day. Simple tasks became overwhelming as I second-guessed every decision, fearing the next public criticism. The constant stress affected my sleep patterns and personal relationships, creating a cycle of deteriorating performance and increased criticism.

This experience revealed how academic institutions can harbor toxic environments that go unchecked, protected by power dynamics and the pressure to maintain professional relationships. While I eventually completed my thesis, the experience left lasting scars and forced me to reconsider my career path in academia.